the feelers

My icy fingers wrap around my 

Tall Skinny Decaf Carmel Macchiato. 

I sit back and look into my friends eyes. 

She’s telling me something very important to her. Anyone could tell from the way she leans forward over the table and pushes her chai tea to the side.

I am listening to her, and to show that I begin to think of what advice I can give to her.

And then, I think of a time when I was struggling with the same thing so I prepare to give her all the details of what happened to me and how I handled it.

As she finishes and takes a sip from her cup, I launch into my lecture.

Thirty minutes later I start my car and “My Own Little World” by Matthew West comes on the radio.

 “Father, break my heart for what breaks Yours. Give me open hands and open doors.

Put Your light in my eyes and let me see that my own little world is not about me…”

And it hit me.

 I didn’t listen to my friend.

I remember what she said, and how she said she felt, 

but I never took the time to think about what that actually might feel like. 

I was preaching at her, like a Pharisee with all the right answers.

I had no empathy.

  - the action of understanding, 

being aware of , 

being sensitive to,

 and vicariously experiencing the feelings, 

thoughts and experiences of another

Jesus called us to be empathetic.

“Love your neighbor as you love yourself.”

~Leviticus 19:18

Doing this would require being sensitive enough to vicarious experience the feelings of my neighbor.

Ok, Lord. Help me. 

I am a selfish friend who cares about others in regard to how they affect me 

with no real concern for their well being. 

Teach me to care for people as You do.