trouble with lists

□   Due, thirty minute case study presentation

□   8am, law exam

□   Overdue, two environmental blog posts

□   Plan, Holiday ice show and skating club lock in

□   Research, fifteen page paper

To do lists always stress me out. Maybe that’s why I rarely make them.

But here I sit with all the contents of my backpack strewn on my bedroom floor and a nicely organized to do list in my lap.

I think I make lists when I feel like I’m dropping the ball.

I know exactly what I need to do, and I know exactly what I keep putting off.

Somehow making a list gives me the feeling that I’m taking the first step in breaking through my procrastination. Then, after I make my list I proceed to do all of the easy things I was going to do anyways and continue to procrastinate the things I don’t like.

I continue shuffling through loose sheets of class handouts, notes and lists when one especially catches my eye:

□   Faith

□   Excellence

□   Knowledge

□   Commitment

□   Self-Control

□   Endurance

□   Godliness

□   Brotherly Kindness

□   Love

I immediately know what this list is. Its from God.

This list is sacred. It is written in order of importance. Each word lays a foundation for the next.

 

“Because of all the God given blessings in verses 3-4,the believer cannot be indifferent or self-satisfied.

Such an abundance of divine grace calls for total dedication.”   ~John MacArthur

“His divine power has given us everything we need

for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us

by his own glory and goodness.

Through these he has given us his very great

and precious promises,

so that through them you may participate in the divine nature,

 having escaped the corruption

in the world caused by evil desires.”

 ~2Peter 1:3-4

Faith is the foundation. Nothing is needed to obtain faith, but faith itself and everything else rests on faith. God doesn’t ask that we find all the answers to all of the big questions of life, or that we organize and clean up our lives first in order to have faith. Its just there, and you can either grab a hold if it or try to pass over it on your way to attaining the next quality. But your efforts will be in vain without it.

Ok, good. I have faith in God. I’ve always believed that He sent His perfect Son Jesus to die in my place; paying his perfect live for my every sin and imperfection. But as I ponder the meaning of faith and the context in which I find it in this list I realize how much faith I lack.

I worry about things outside my control every day.

Where is the faith in that?

For ten weeks I’ve been studying this list one word at a time until I’ve finally come to the last word, LOVE, and I’m not any bit closer to checking off anything from this list.

 

What is more depressing than a check list you can never check off?

For weeks this list has been gathering dust in a dark corner of my mind, frustrating me every time I take it out in hopes of checking something…anything off.

Each elusive word on the page seemed to mock my flawed efforts to master it.

My frustration was turning to anger.

God, why do you give me impossible tings to do?

You’re perfect and I’m so very imperfect.

Then He subtly reminds me to look at verse three:

“Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises,

so that through them you may participate in the divine nature…”

Oh, I had been spending all of my efforts focusing on my failure at checking off list impossible that I had lost my perspective. I had stopped looking at God.

I wasn’t seeing

through my list

to the God who gave it to me.

Like a good teacher

He had given me an assignment

which He had promised to help me with

when I needed it.

"I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength."

Phillipians 4:13